Why Consent Matters


Consent is about more than sex. It’s about showing respect for your partner and their body, and it’s an integral part of healthy relationships. Consent isn’t just a legal concept: it should be central to every romantic or sexual encounter you have. When consent is missing from sex and dating, trust can be eroded and feelings may be hurt—and sometimes worse things happen too. If you’re not sure whether someone has consented to something or if you’re concerned that someone is coercing them into doing something sexual they don’t want to do, then this guide is for you!

Consent is sexy.

While you may be tempted to think that consent is “just a word,” it’s not. It’s a symbol of respect, trust, and love. For example: if I asked for your consent before kissing you or holding your hand, that would show me that we share an intimate connection and that I care about your boundaries.

By getting someone’s consent before engaging in sexual activity with them, you’re showing them that they matter enough to ensure their comfort and safety—because otherwise why would you want to do anything with them at all?

It’s clear from this simple example why consent matters so much: it’s one of the most fundamental ways we can demonstrate our mutual desire as human beings with each other.

You can’t tell someone’s consent status based on their sexual orientation.

There is no reliable way to determine someone’s consent status by looking at their gender, their gender expression, or even their sexual orientation. This is because a person’s identity—their sexuality, gender, and/or gender identity—is not an indicator of whether they are giving consent to another person.

When we look at the way that people express themselves through clothing or makeup, it can seem like there are clear distinctions between men and women or masculine-presenting people and feminine-presenting ones. However, these are just societal expectations based on our experiences with dominant cultures (i.e., Western society). There are many other ways that people choose to express their gender: some wear makeup every day; others don’t; some women have short hair while others grow theirs long; some men wear dresses because they like that style while others don’t care what they wear as long as it makes them feel good! And none of these choices affect whether someone wants to have sex with you!

Even when two people say “yes” at the same time about having sex together (but only after asking each other first), there could still be problems later down the road. If trust becomes damaged because one partner felt pressured into saying “yes” instead of truly feeling comfortable saying so voluntarily before making any moves forward together sexually…

There is no such thing as implied consent.

If you’re not sure if someone is giving consent, then don’t assume that they are. There is no such thing as implied consent. If someone is unsure about something and wants to talk about it, they will let you know by saying “no.” Every time.

Your partner’s “yes” in the past doesn’t mean they will consent now or in the future.

When it comes to consent, you can’t put too much emphasis on the importance of getting verbal consent. The “yes” or “no” that your partner gives shouldn’t be taken as a static agreement; it’s an ongoing process that should be discussed throughout sexual activity.

A person who has given consent before (for example, they said yes last time you asked) doesn’t mean they will give it again in the future. If someone asks for sex, don’t assume that because they said yes once before means they will say yes again. The same goes for any other kind of sexual touch—if your partner says no to something tonight, then ask if their feelings might change tomorrow or next week; if so, then come back with another request at that time!

To be valid, consent must be given freely and with knowledge.

  • Consent must be given freely and without coercion. Any form of manipulation or intimidation is not consent. This can include verbal pressure, implied threats, blackmailing, or any other means that interfere with your ability to make an informed decision about what you want to do.
  • Consent must be given with knowledge of the circumstances surrounding sexual activity. Some things you may want to know before giving consent: what will happen (oral sex, vaginal intercourse); where it will happen (in my dorm room? In public?); who else might witness this act (my roommate? Our friends?); if there are any risks involved (STIs, pregnancy).
  • Consent must be given with knowledge of the outcome for both parties involved in a sexual encounter/relationship—including possible pregnancy and STIs as well as emotional trauma associated with certain acts such as penetration or oral sex performed on men or women. This includes understanding how alcohol consumption affects one’s ability to give consent; while having sex when intoxicated may seem like fun at the time, there’s always potential risk involved in engaging in sexual activity while under the influence.

Sexual and romantic relationships should be based on mutual willingness, not coercion or obligation.

Consent is the process of permitting something to happen. It’s an ongoing dialogue between you and your partner, where you check in with each other throughout the relationship to ensure that both parties are still happy with whatever is happening. Consent isn’t just a one-time thing—it’s an ongoing conversation!

Consent is not the absence of a “no” or “yes.” Your partner can say no to any activity at any time, even if they’ve given consent previously. And it’s not only OK but also imperative that you respect your partner’s boundaries and don’t push them into doing anything they aren’t comfortable with. If your partner says no, respect their wishes when attempting sexual acts or expressing affection in other ways—even if this makes you feel uncomfortable or frustrated. Your needs aren’t more important than theirs; make sure that your desires align with those of your partner before proceeding further together sexually or romantically.


I hope this article helped understand the importance of talking about consent with your partner. We all want to be good people and make sure our partners are happy, but we must remember that it takes more than just saying “yes” to have a healthy relationship. If you’re having trouble communicating with your partner or if they don’t seem like they’re into what you’re doing, don’t be afraid to stop and ask them if everything is okay! You can start by asking them how comfortable they are with certain activities—this will help both of you communicate better about what does or doesn’t feel good for each other so that no one feels pressured into doing anything they aren’t comfortable with.